Speaking Truthfully

I Love Language, But . . .

I love language: as my sister Gina says to me, “you are woefully unable to keep your mouth shut.” OK, she’s right. For years, I used “Have Mouth, Will Travel” as my professional tag line, though now I tend to favor the new — and thoroughly modest — “a radically brilliant speaker and coach.”

Yes, I love language. I love the feel of it in my brain, the sound of it as it takes birth in the world. I love the energy of it. I love the drumbeat cadence of rhythmic, poetic speaking. I love how we can use language to understand each other, to form connections with each other, to become intimate with each other. I love the way language can enchant people and take them on glorious journeys of possibilities, of epiphanies and realizations about the mystery of life. I love the way language can be used to illuminate dark places and things, the way it can be used to encourage, to arouse, to awaken — yes, language is good!

These are just a few of the reasons I love language. But . . . there is something I love more than language, something vital to Speaking Truthfully. In fact, the Speaking Truthfully philosophy, principles, and practices were discovered in this thing that I love more than language.

I love silence more. I’ve known this for decades. And, intensifying that love affair with silence, I experienced what I call “the collapse of language” at some point during the five-year healing cocoon I lived in, courtesy of a number of cells-gone-wild (aka “lung cancer”). I lived for too many months to count without language. The whole structure of it, the very meaning of language itself, just collapsed within me. I was aware only of silence. I’ve written about this in a few Blog posts, most notably when speaking (irony abounds) about my “pony rides to oblivion.”

I didn’t miss language when it left me because I fell more deeply in love with the silence I had flirted with for decades — through such activities as meditation, self-inquiry contemplation, and mindfully paying attention to the miracle of breath. I didn’t miss language because within this primal silence — which appeared on its own, without any intention or effort on my part — I experienced a euphoria that I had never experienced in language. I was brought into rhythmic coexistence with the life-force, the very breath, that enlivens and sustains all living things. I experienced a level of clarity, of non-dogmatic “truth,” that language can only approximate. I experienced what mysticism calls unity-with-all-that-is. I experienced the peace and beauty and simplicity of utter silence, of unending stillness.

“My Weekend With Robert” by Carol Daniel

Carol Daniel participated in the Speaking Truthfully masterclass, Liberate Your Cosmic Roar!, in Salinas, CA over the weekend of June 24-25, 2017, hosted by Marlie Avant. She wrote this at the request of her longtime friend, Judy Simeone, a yoga teacher in CT. Judy is hosting a masterclass in her yoga studio in September.

My Weekend With Robert

by Carol Daniel

Carol Daniel

First of all, I have to say that this workshop has been one of the most impactful that I have ever done and I’ve certainly done plenty!

I found Robert on the Internet while I was struggling with how to balance my spiritual life with the craziness that was going on in our elections. He and Tim Freke had done a video called Radical Sages. They talked about spirituality being about how we show up in the world. These were words my heart needed to hear because I was so confused by my “spiritual” friends being unwilling to try to find a place for what was going on in the world outside.

I continued to follow Robert online and became intrigued by his Speaking Truthfully program. For years I have hated my shyness and my basic survival mechanism, which is to hide. I had never considered actually trying to heal this maladaptive behavior. It just seemed like this was who I was. Listening to Robert, I began to think that it might be possible to do my life in a better way. I decided to sign up for his upcoming workshop. I wrote him saying, “I am 73 years old and I’m tired of hiding.”

The Tall Poppy Syndrome

Most of us have a governor on our capacity for full authentic self-expression. A governor is device that “automatically regulates the supply of fuel, steam, or water to a machine, ensuring uniform motion or limiting speed.” The governor we have inside us automatically regulates the supply of shakti, life force, in order to limit our ability to speak truthfully, to disturb the universe with our primal presence and cosmic roar. In Australia, this governing device is called “tall poppy syndrome.”

My first direct experience of this tall poppy notion came one morning in a workshop I was leading, shortly after I moved to Australia in 2005. I wondered aloud why a few of the participants danced so delicately around an issue they wanted to discuss. They did everything but speak plainly. I encouraged them to speak more boldly and directly. In our subsequent conversation, they said they had learned to not be bold or direct. They said that it wasn’t right to speak out too loudly. They didn’t want to stick out, or stand above others. They told me about the tall poppy syndrome, which I’ve come to understand as a kind of cultural suppression of creative self-expression.

The tall poppy syndrome is a topic that showed up in every one of my workshops in Australia, over the course of almost six years. It is a fire-walk that many have to take in order to break the hold of this socialization, their learned reticence to stand up, stick out, and speak brilliantly, powerfully, passionately, authentically!

When I asked one of my Australian friends to give me her definition of the tall poppy syndrome, she said, “Let’s not get too high and mighty, let’s not get too carried away with ourself. We don’t want anyone getting too full of their own talent or accomplishment. If they do, why we’ll just cut them down to size. We’ll have no tall poppies in our fields!”

Another said, “Australians are carrying a national consciousness of unworthiness, stemming from our roots as a convict colony. When one of us tries to move into the bigger world, to dream a bigger vision, we briefly project all of our personal unmet ambitions onto him. When it turns out he is human and experiences a moment of failure, or is in our eyes somehow not good enough or undeserving, we pull him down justifying our own choice not to have at least tried to expand our horizons. Just like the elephants tied to the chains who don’t realise they are bigger than the chains, we are re-creating our convict history via our tall poppy syndrome, believing ourselves to be prisoners simultaneously worshipping, fearing, and resenting the ones who break free.”

Facebook Group: Speaking Truthfully Tribe

I have established a private Facebook group exclusively for people who have participated in some aspect of Speaking Truthfully (originally branded as RealTime Speaking): masterclass, webinar, or personal coaching. The purpose of this group is to maintain a communal space for people of the Speaking Truthfully Tribe to meet, share, encourage, inspire, appreciate, acknowledge and in all kinds of ways fan the flames of the speaking truthfully “philosophy.” I will hang out around the edges, as I don’t want this to become my page. I will certainly participate, even answer questions if I can, though not at the expense of in-depth coaching. If you know of someone who has taken a class, webinar, or coaching session, let them know about this group, please. Let’s see if we can use it to our collective joy, expansion, and benefit!

Please join in the fun!

 

Online Speaking Truthfully Masterclass, exclusively for 8 Women!

Online Speaking Truthfully Masterclass with Robert Rabbin!

Lotus Kruse — a longtime friend and collaborator of mine and a preeminent teacher, mentor, catalyst, mother, and woman with a wild heart — is organizing an online Speaking Truthfully masterclass, exclusively for eight women! This online class will be led by Speaking Truthfully founder Robert Rabbin. The class details and registration information are just below a description of this Speaking Truthfully masterclass by Lotus.

Lotus Kruse

“Speaking Truthfully Masterclass is a very potent taste of what it means to be free in the world and make an impact stretching across all platforms of public speaking, keynote speaking, presenting, teaching, coaching, advocating, social justice platforms through to intimate communication with loved ones, children, parents, beloveds and the most intimate of all; how we speak truthfully with and to ourselves. Speaking Truthfully is not just an idealogy, it is a framework for living authentically.

“I have undertaken this Masterclass personally with Robert and produced three for his Australian clients over the past few years. Everyone of these Speaking Truthful Masterclasses are intimate gatherings of no more than eight people. Each Masterclass is full of powerful content and also oriented around the participants of the program for the maximum impact for each person. As much as the content is powerful and worthy of including into the very fibre of your being, it is Robert himself who is the true gold of this program. As he teachers that we are the message, he embodies this principal ; thus the program takes on an educational experience, a self inqury oppotunity and a transmition of what being the message truely is. He will never say this so I am making it my job to say it.

“I have been deeply blessed to have spent over two years with Robert as my mentor and over five years as my friend and I see how my neuro wiring has vastly changed from the exchange and work undertaken with Robert. I wish for this level of freedom for everyone.

I invite you to join Robert in this next Speaking Truthfully Masterclass.”

Love.

Lotus Kruse

Connection is the Whole Deal

Of the many sudden, almost fierce, insights I’ve had post-terminal cancer diagnosis was the realization of how rarely I had connected with people throughout my life. I mean deeply and truly connected; connected as if the only thing that ever existed was that moment, with that person or those people. I saw that my connections with people were often utilitarian and business-like, with one eye on the person or people I was speaking with, and one eye on the clock and my calendar, projects, and ambitions. I was too busy to connect, too busy to be present, and too busy to pay attention — to the degree I know now is essential.

"Kiss at the Beach" / original artwork by Myriam Negre

“Kiss at the Beach” / original artwork by Myriam Negre

As I emerge from my almost three-year healing cocoon, I’m noticing that the kind of connection I rarely made with people is now of utmost importance. No, that’s not it. It’s more than that: the realism, the reality, of being a human being, and of meeting other human beings, is predicated on this quality of connection. Without being fully present and without paying full attention to our own self and to others in the precise instants in which we are together, we cannot truly have connection.

Song of Sudden Freedom

If we are seeking what is real, the real is seeking us.

If we long to know the truth, the truth longs to know us.

If we want to drown in love, love wants to live in us.

These entities are everywhere, even pounding on drums in the ceremonial centers of our cells — trillions of them. They flood into and from us.

Be a child in this on-rushing love: don’t move. Stand still. Don’t try to find the real, or know the truth, or experience love. All effort pushes it away. Be like a lost child and wait to be found. Stand still, be open, look and see that everything you want is already taking you, filling you, possessing you.

We don’t need to seek: we have already found.

We don’t need to learn: we already know.

We don’t have to become: we already are.

SEE THIS AND BE FREE.

The world is alive and breathing inside your very body. All that you treasure is within you. Your inadequacy is but a habit, your bondage an illusion, your fears but shadows and gossip. Let go of all you hold on to. Only you can free yourself from your own deception. Forgive yourself, step into the light of love rushing towards you from a million inner suns.

No one has harmed you, no one has wronged you. Only your pride thinks this is so. Let it go. Bitterness is your own dark night. Let it go. There is nothing worth protecting. Let the breath of new life fill you and fill your mind and fill your body. Your cells are now vibrating with new life. Your heart is opening, your being is growing larger and larger, colliding with the onrushing love. In this collision you can dissolve without fear.

A HEARTFELT MESSAGE TO MY BROTHERS — ABOUT WOMEN

A HEARTFELT MESSAGE TO MY BROTHERS ABOUT HOW WE TREAT WOMEN

I first thought I should wait to write and post this, because I am having some real issues with chemo brain— a common term used to describe thinking and memory problems that can occur after cancer treatment, which I had a few days ago.

Chemo brain can also be called chemotherapy-related cognitive impairment. I like this one, because it is so significant-sounding. Write or wait?

You be the judge. Maybe if I waited, I’d be more articulate, coherent, and persuasive. Maybe not. I feel drunk, stoned, and exhausted. Chemo brain sucks. I should wait.

But, I don’t want to wait. I’m clear enough on this now. My cancer treatments remind me that life is live TV: no reruns. It’s now or it’s not. So, here it is.

I have been around. I have done, seen, and heard a lot of stuff. Truly. Trust me. So, it takes a lot to make my mind spin out of control behind a massive WTF. But it does happen, more often than I’d like to admit.

Sometimes this happens in the wake of a big thing, like a whistleblower-inspired revelation of governmental or corporate misconduct. I confess to being particularly susceptible to ideas and actions motivated by greed, cruelty, and deception. Sometimes, this WTF-head-spin happens in the wake of a small thing, in terms of social media coverage or cultural outrage.

This is what I want to talk about. A small thing. Seemingly. It’s about how we men sometimes treat women. Not our women, but women. Hear the difference?

In her talk in one of my Speaking Truthfully classes, this brave woman told us that her significant other had forbidden her from attending an event that he had not been invited to. He said that she could not go, that she could not defy him. No discussion. No negotiation. No reasons. Just: You cannot go. Do not defy me.

Read the rest of this article at Rebelle Society.